Double-O who? As Pierce Brosnan suits up for his last turn as James Bond,
it's time to give the jet-setting spy job to another brother.
by Sharon Knolle
|CHARACTER||QUALIFICATIONS ||TITLE|| WHAT HE'D ADD||WHAT HE'D SUBTRACT|
|Even aliens know he can pack a mean punch -- and that was before he trained to play Muhammad Ali.
||Only the Freshest Survive
|| Chart-busting theme song, "Only the Freshest Survive."
||The last thing we need is Tommy Lee Jones as Q.
Benicio Del Toro
||Clean him up, slap him in a tux, and this badass border cop could make a dapper spy, not to mention an excellent ladies' man.
||An Oscar, an ability to juggle women and get laid a lot.
||The Usual Suspects mumble was funny once, but James Bond needs to enunciate.
||He's already studying with Bill Clinton for a role as president, so why not multitask and ask the sex-crazed ex-prez for pointers with the ladies?
||Never Touch 007's Radio
||Some movies Jackie Chan taught him for Rush Hour, plus he's damn funny.
||Octopussy jokes would get tiring fast.
||The Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon star's also known for his ultra-smooth, well-dressed turns in John Woo's The Killer and Hard Boiled
||From Hong Kong With a Bullet
||Two-fisted shooting style, his own toothpick for the martinis.
||Bond is decidedly less suave with subtitles.
||Oh sure, he's funny behind a desk, but what about when shorty's getting chased by murderous villains?
||Death is for the Tall
||Sardonic wit, ability to raise one eyebrow at a time.
||Too nervous to "perform" with multiple Bond girls.